My Partner Doesn’t Know About My Debts

Saturday, March 12th, 2011 at 5:16 am

If you have debt and you are keeping it secret from your partner, then your not alone. From the emails and comments we receive, it appears that many people are hiding their debts from their husbands, wife’s or partners.

Many of the debts are from before the couple got together. Many of our readers feel guilty and don’t know what to do. Many feel like it will be the end of their relationship if they come clean about their debts.

It is difficult for us to give advice on relationship issues and this is am especially difficult one because many people feel it will destroy everything they cherish. To put this simply, if you have debts that you are keeping secret from your partner, you must sit down with them and talk it through. Plan what you are going to say and explain that it has been eating you up that you haven’t told them before.

You will find that a huge weight will be lifted if you are open about your debts. From our research and emails, we can tell you that the first few days may not be easy. Nearly everyone says that their partner was really angry to begin with then, after a few days or weeks, they slowly came around. The only exception to being open is if there is a fear of violence in the relationship.

my partner doesnt know about my debts Once you have told your partner about your debts and the initial anger goes away, many people have said it has brought them closer together. Chances are, you partner may help you manage your debts.

Remember that YOU are the only one legally responsible for debts taken out in your name alone, so it will not affect your partner directly.

If your debts are unmanageable and your partner cannot afford to help, you may want to consider a debt management plan which will freeze interest on the majority of your debts. Other options are a debt relief order or an IVA. Each of these have their drawbacks and stipulations but can be an effective way to manage your debts.

The last resort would be Bankruptcy. This should be avoided if you have a mortgage in joint names.

If you were to file for bankruptcy, all your assets would be viewed, including your property. If your property has equity in it, your portion of may be taken to be paid into the bankruptcy. If the property is in joint names, the Official Receiver may allow your partner buy out any equity in the dwelling. If your partner cannot do this, the Trustee, could put the property up for sale.